


Ultimately

by Aieika



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Family, Fluff and Angst, Gen, If you haven't read through chapter 56 I would read that first, Implied Relationships, Parent Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-18
Updated: 2014-04-18
Packaged: 2018-01-19 21:37:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 706
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1484962
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aieika/pseuds/Aieika
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Levi only has two fears and neither are what most people would expect.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ultimately

**Author's Note:**

> If you have not read chapter 56 of the Manga then be prepared for spoilers.
> 
> Also this is very speculative. Please read my snk blog post on tumblr http://3dmg4u.tumblr.com/post/83055585570/chapter-56-theories

He had always followed orders.

It was the part of himself that he hated the most. He had never been the leader, always the follower... always a perfect follower, ready and willing to do anything for the sake of the goals of his leader. He really only had two weaknesses; one of which more people then he liked knew about, and the other only three people living knew about.   
The first was his fear of being alone.

He wasn't sociable or friendly, and he never liked large crowds. He had no fear of death or pain that most of his comrades had. He was not afraid of titans. He was mortified by the thought of being the last one left. He knew he could keep fighting, and would keep fighting until he had nothing left to give. He was humanities strongest and he had a nasty habit of outliving those he cares about most. Friends and family died around him while he continues to push onward, trying desperately to make connections he knows will only last for so long. It was a closely guarded secret that he loved to be touched, to feel and hear the heartbeat of another person, and to know that they are alive. Leadership was lonely and for that reason he would never make a true leader.   
He looked at the girl laying next to him, barely making out her outline in the minimal moonlight seeping through the fabric of the small tent. 

They were doing recon on some potential locations for hiding out while they hid from those that would try to capture Historia and Eren. They had chosen to move as light as physically possible. They had one single person tent that they would never of fit into together if one of them was not as slight as they were, a single bedroll that they both barely were able to squeeze into comfortably, their rations, and their extra gas. They had taken a single horse in order to make it look like there was only one traveler as opposed to two. 

Mikasa's breathing was even and deep and had been for a while now. Levi took a slow breath and did what he had wanted to do for so long. He didn't even have to scoot to touch her, just shift his weight slightly. He brought his arm around her gingerly and awkwardly and pressed his lips to her temple. 

His second weakness. The one only three people knew about.

He had been devastated when one of those three tried to use his weakness against him, to take control of him again. He supposed that it could have been worse looking back. He would have done anything, turned into anything to protect them. That was why he had hid them in the first place. He had never been so grateful that he had chosen to trust Grisha with the secret. Never been so grateful that Grisha had continued to help and pass reports along to him of what had happened. 

If Grisha and his son had not been there... 

Levi had no right to her at all. He had done what he had to in order to protect her... but in doing so he had abandoned her. Had left her in the care of his cousin, who had failed to keep her and her mother safe. He had left her to live with the Jaeger family, to be raised by people that he had never met. Even now he could do nothing but be content with the chance to hold her. It wasn't much different from the one time he was able to hold her before; awkwardly with the fear that he was doing it wrong.

Only Erwin knows that he has two reasons to protect Eren, and only one of those has to do with humanity. 

He risked his entire mission against the female titan for her. 

He got in the way of a nearly lethal blow for her. 

He rescued Eren for her; loosing Eren would have broken her.

Without even knowing it, this slip of a girl had more power over him then anything or anyone. 

Because ultimately a parent will do anything to protect their child.


End file.
